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Maya Karin hates lizards and wants to be a tiger. Seriously.

So Maya Karin is our favourite gal, isn’t she? Everyone wants a part of her. The media darling has to fend off – literally – advertisers, product marketing people, fans. Yes, she is just so special and nobody has anything bad to say about her.

And that’s why she’s going to be the focus of today’s post <insert off-hand smiley>.

5 things you did not know about Maya Karin:

1. Maya hates lizards “with a vengeance”. Apparently, these poor little wall crawlers freak her out. It could be her repressed sense of loyalty towards religion of course, but I’d better not risk saying so. Oops.

2. Maya likes the Souled Out eatery in Hartamas because she blends in there. Seriously, Maya admits that she blends in with the pishy poshy of Hartamas. I’m going to make a new simile now: “She doesn’t stand a chance… like a naked Maya Karin in Petaling Street.”

3. Maya does not expect to see dolphins “in Australia off a cliff”. That’s right, folks. All the years of MTV and Discovery Channel haven’t taught Maya to expect seeing wildlife off the coast of Australia.

4. Maya would like to be a tiger, if she could. I suppose she means tigress, but then I always did suspect her masculine qualities to point to some dark secret. Of course, it could also be just an innocent reference to her brief appearance as a tiger spirit in one of her movies. It was a lousy movie, Maya. Get over it.

5. Maya thinks that the “faith” that people put in her “as an entertainer and artiste” also qualifies as faith in her “as an endorsement personality”. WTF? Who makes all these terms up anyway? I hereby declare the birth of another simile: “She is as much a saint as Maya Karin is an endorsement personality.”

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Monday, June 8th, 2009 Your Abattoir No Comments

Cute blonde chick with hairy pussy

Cute blonde chick with hairy pussy

Cute blonde chick with hairy pussy

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Thursday, June 4th, 2009 Your Abattoir No Comments

I love Piah Zadora – Part 1

It’s true. I absolutely love him/her. And I mean it with no sarcasm or cynicism. I will tell you why I love her – one reason at a time – because I want to.

Reason Number One: She/He gets a lot of publicity. Now publicity is something I never dislike. No such thing as bad publicity, yes? She/He’s bringing a lot of attention to a lot of other bloggers and I want a piece of that splendidly delicious pie. But I dig this Piah person so much I’d rather be on his or her good books.

So yes, definitely, I will tell you more. I love him/her. Oh yeah.

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Monday, December 15th, 2008 Pertinent 1 Comment

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